it's a lot like this...

Frog Creek Lodge front porch . Feast Retreat (photo by Sasha Clements)

When I return from hosting one of my Be Present Retreats, I always struggle with how to talk about it here in this space. Capturing the truly life-changing moments with words escapes me. I seldom take photos because I am too busy with other pieces of the experience.

Feast was one of those retreats where I repeatedly found myself whispering silently, "I am home" as I moved from one moment to the next. I felt firmly rooted in knowing I am doing what I am supposed to be doing, and deeply called to circle with women more often.

On that final Sunday, just as we finished unloading the car back at my house, an email from my friend Sasha arrived. She was one of the first to leave the lodge that morning and during her time alone traveling home, she wrote a poem that captured Feast. 

I stood in my studio reading these words with tears in my eyes so grateful to be on this path.

***

Tiny nature altar . Feast Retreat (photo by Sasha Clements)

I carry

In a basket woven of chartreuse moss,
Stitched together with needles of pine,
Bound with multicolored scarves and scraps of lace from women before,
Strengthened with reeds smoothed flat by rocks of vulnerability,
Infused with scents of rose petals and patchouli…

I carry

Doubt,
Love,
Strength,
Confidence,
Fear,
Stories,
Courage,
Friendship,
Connection.

I carry
The glittery bits that spill out of the cracks
Of souls and hearts and minds,
Wet with tears and echoing laughter.

I carry
A white cup cushioned by a mothers gentle hand,
A white bowl still perfectly warm from the feast of nurturing kindness.

I carry
Circles of fabric and dreams,
Circles of pencil and paint,
Circles from the sea,
Circles of flickering light,
Circles of memory.

I carry it all
In the basket by my side,
In the pockets of my soul,
On the bookshelf of my mind,
In the space around my heart.

I carry
A filled up basket
Forward with me to the next journey.
Fortified,
Ready,
Open.

I carry
All I have gathered,
All I need,
To save myself again.

- Sasha Clements

About Sasha: I am... a free-spirited wild child, tethered to the responsibilities of the real world, walking a tightrope of compromise, and searching for a sweet blend of dreams and reality.

I work a full time as a communications and project coordinator for an electric cooperative in Indiana. After 30+ years, I’m still in love with my high school sweetheart. I’m a mom to a grown son and a “G” (grandma) to a 4-year-old superhero in training. When my alter ego demands creative play, I dabble in writing, photography, food, clay, yarn, and paint.

I believe the recipe for “retreat magic” includes a lovely combination of wise and generous teachers, like-minded souls circled together, and the invitation to share the truth of your story in a safe space. I crave the nourishment this magic gives - it’s why I attend retreats.

Connect with Sasha at her blog.

***

And today, I'm so excited to announce that a sneak peek of the Fall Retreat, Story Excavation, is up over at the Be Present Retreats site.

Registration goes live on Wednesday, May 1 at 8 AM PST.

If you feel called to join Jen Lee, Kelly Barton, Sasha, and me on the Oregon Coast this September, please be aware that the summer retreat sold out in less than 24 hours. We don't want you to miss your spot!

Learn all the juicy details here.

secret messages

Yesterday was supposed to be my first full day in my studio in weeks. But instead, it unfolded a bit upside down.

While gathering the dirty dishes to one place on the counter last evening, I looked down and saw all these happy colors and this message on my mug and I couldn't help but pause and pay attention.

Trusting the process is a true practice. It isn't easy. Some days I look at this mug in the cupboard and practically roll my eyes and choose another one. But this message appears again and again and not just in my kitchen cupboard. 

And when I'm quiet enough and give myself space to really listen to what I know, these are often the words I hear.

Invitation: This weekend, pay attention to the secret messages appearing on your path, and then come back here and tell me about them. 

***

The "Trust the Process" mug is from The Universe Knows. They're having a 15% off sale through May 6. Love their mugs and hoodies.

trust

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like major...

There are so many things I want to tell you but I went from re-entry after the Feast Retreat (more on that luscious retreat this week) to a visit from my mom (we are putting up art + photos everywhere and brainstorming some business things and tomorrow she's making my favorite marinara sauce to go in the freezer) and my writing brain is not quite ready for this space, so today, I really just want to tell you that I love my new haircut. Like major.

And the number one piece of advice I have is to create a haircut board on Pinterest and then show it to your stylist every single time. (This is the cut we aimed for this time and I'm hoping to add the longer front pieces from this one this summer.)

Tell me something about your corner of the world. How are things over there?

PS Jen, Kelly, and I are totally working on the final details of the Fall Retreat. Registration will be next week. Stay tuned!

circling with women :: a giveaway

Circle of Women . print available here

As I continue to reintegrate into daily life after the Feast Retreat and sift through the stories I want to share, I'm delighted to share this gorgeous print filled with the words of wisdom from Jeanette LeBlanc.

These words capture reasons why I created the Be Present Retreats, why I feel called to circle with women, and why I feel called to circle even more this year, and why I hope you will create your own circles in your corner of the world.

wisdom lit up by twinkle lights and candles at Feast . photo by Jessica DeFeo

During our closing ceremony, one of the ladies at Feast shared that she hoped we would open our hearts to the women in our communities who aren't able to circle like we did.

As she was talking, I kept thinking, "Yes, this."

A Giveaway

The "Circle of Women" print shown above was hanging near our circle during Feast, and I am so excited to share that Jeanette is giving one away today.

To enter the giveaway :: Please leave a comment sharing a piece of your story today. This giveaway has ended. The winner (Leah) has been notified. Thank you!

Feel free to share anything from how the weather is to a secret dream. You might even want to share how you already circle with women or how you long to. And yes, this giveaway is open to men! I imagine the men out there have women in their lives who they would love to see supported by other women in the beautiful ways this print invites. The giveaway will remain open through Sunday evening at 8PM PST.

One More Good Thing

AND I am also happy to share that Jeanette is having a sale in her shop. Both the Circle of Women print + Go Now and Live (shown below) are both on sale for the next few days.

Go Now and Live print . available here

Go Now and Live was also hanging in our cabin in the woods. The story behind this print is so beautiful. An excerpt from Jeanette's story about this print, "I thought about what I would tell my 21 year old self if I had a chance to go back in time and whisper in her ear as she slept.  What knowledge would I want to impart to that idealistic young woman with the whole world at her feet?  As I thought, these words flowed from me and something inside me was healed."

Yes, this.

Read the rest of the story and buy the print (on sale!) here.

***

Jeanette LeBlanc is a writer, photographer poet and dreamer. She regularly consumes ridiculous amounts of dark chocolate, craves the sound of crashing waves and wishes people would stop putting olives on pizza. She has a love affair with words (all of them, especially the bad ones) and is inspired by the intersection of shadows and light. Hopelessly idealistic and impossibly pragmatic, Jeanette fully believes that she will one day earn a very good living with her camera and her writing. In the event that Plan A doesn’t work out, she is willing to settle for a huge lottery win, or the generosity of a very rich benefactor. Either way, she has no intention of being a starving artist. Jeanette lives in Phoenix, Arizona with her delightfully unruly children. Jeanette writes about life, love and beauty and creates inspired design at Peace.Love.Free. Her fine art prints are available for purchase here. 

holding compassion

I'm thinking about you in your corner of the world.

I'm thinking about how things unfold in the ways we least expect.

I'm thinking about all that we cannot control.

I'm thinking about people circling with love.

I'm thinking about how we can lift one another up in simple, real ways.

I'm thinking about you.

And I'm sending you love, compassion, hope, and peace today.

***

Over here, I'm turning to a compassion meditation today as I think about so many around the world who need love right now. 

If you'd like to join me, click here to download a guided meditation that talks you through creating space for compassion and love for another (and yourself).

Sending light and love across the miles,

Liz

capturing this moment: where i stand

april 2013

A few months ago, I remember seeing a question float across Twitter that said something like, "Why this obessession with taking photos of our feet everywhere?"

I don't recall if I responded, but I know I wanted to say, "Because it helps me to really notice this moment and where I stand in my life."

This could be literal:

april 2010

Standing barefoot in the backyard for the first time in the spring while peeking over my 8-month pregnant belly.

Or much more abstract:

June 2012

Standing in the backyard after my two-year-old daughter handed me flowers she found in the midst of a really difficult day. Words I paired with this photo:

i am leaning into this life

(choose trust)

It helps me capture the feelings underneath:

taken in april 2009 in the front yard of my grandparents'
home after my grandfather died

petals
121 gerow avenue
just before leaving for the last time

It is another form of self-portraiture that helps me to find myself in the midst of all the roles I play, it creates space for me to connect with the ground beneath me, reminds me of where I am and where I've been and where I want to go.

In her book The Wisdom of No Escape, Pema Chodron talks about how we are "the ground" of our practice. These photos remind me of this too. 

Who I am, with all my beautiful, wacky, gorgeous, silly, realness, is where my practice begins. And pausing to notice where I stand, where I am right now in this moment, helps me to unearth that truth again and again.

An invitation

Over the next few days, find your feet beneath you and snap a self-portrait. Maybe put your bare feet in the grass for the first time this Spring. Take a walk and find flowers blooming or the snow that still insists on arriving or a feather and stand right next to it and capture that moment in your lens. Write the words you most need to remember on a sticky note, put it right down by your toes, and snap it. 

Find where you stand in this moment. 

And then come back here and tell me all about it. Leave a link in the comments to your photo or just let us know how the experience was for you. 

***

You can find more about this prompt and other juicy self-portrait prompts in my book Inner Excavation: Explore Your Self Through Photography, Poetry, and Mixed Media. I'm delighted to share that I'm selling copies again, this time at a special discounted price of $18. Read more about the book and order it from me right here. (I'll even sign it for you and include one of my poem note postcards.)

here: retreat prep

it's to-do lists next to to-do lists

and grocery shopping

and laying out several possible outfits for EJ in case her daddy has trouble getting her dressed

it's freshly laundered stacked vintage quilts

next to super secret good stuff + my favorite pens

next to art supplies, a new instax, and starry lights

next to spices, a food processor, and pepitas

it's picking up my partner in crime at the airport

one last run to Target

and squeezing in a haircut

it's a basket of poetry

two suitcases full of books

and one vintage typewriter

it's slowing down to soak it up

it's counting down the minutes until they arrive

it's creating space to feel the expectations

and deciding again and again to just show up as me

it's opening my heart to this

yes, this.