the kindred project: day 1 (my story)

 

The Kindred Project: 12 Days of Light and Yes is about sharing our stories of light and hope. The moments where we said "yes" to choosing beauty in the midst of it all. The moments where we stood in our own light. The moments where we saw someone else choose hope. The moments where another became our teacher and where we taught ourselves. Read more about the project and share your own stories in this post.

*****

there is this place inside me where i push myself to see the simple beauty in the midst of it all. where i choose to say yes. where i own this truth: love is all you need. where i choose happiness even when i want to wallow. where i open my heart to a power greater than me and try to listen.

this place is where i choose to stand in the light within me.

over the last year and a half, life has pushed and pulled this little family, my little family, and me in ways jon and i could never have imagined. when our child was only five weeks old, we stood inside the fear that she might die. months later, we sat in a waiting room while a surgeon opened up her chest to heal her. today, i glance up at the clock and don't even realize that i am counting down the hours until her next dose of medication. it is part of my normal, so it just is.

over the last year and a half and in many other moments in my past, life has pushed and pulled me in the ways that it does when you live with your heart open. i have been cracked apart by grief. i have been surprised by betrayal. i have experienced trauma to my body. i have been forgotten. and i have made mistakes. big ones. i have forgotten to be a friend. i have forgotten to say i love you. i have forgotten to say thank you. i have forgotten to say i am sorry...

there have been days when i find myself simply overwhelmed with all of it. and i have stood in front of the mirror and let go of trying to find the smile and given myself the gift of honoring what is real.

and somewhere along the way in the last ten years, life pushed me to see and finally own this truth: i choose. i choose. i choose.

and so i (try) to listen to this place inside me that pushes me to know that to my core: i choose hope. i choose joy. i choose love.

when i began to make this choice, my life opened up. i began to recognize the lights on my path. i found people who see me; friends who love me anyway. i began to notice the teachers in my life. i began to find my way and know that i am not alone. i began to realize i can live my deepest dreams into reality. 

in this moment: i choose to say YES to living inside the beauty and truth in the home that is me.

the kindred project

there are 12 days in the spring that have become the 12 days that created this little family that lives in this little house in the pacific northwest.

today, may 27th, is jon's birthday.
my birthday is in almost two weeks, on june 7.
and right in the middle is the day when little eleanor jane took her first breath.

12 days that created this little family.

so for these 12 days, i want to have a celebration with a little project. i want to do something to honor the way that we choose joy, hope, love...the way that we choose to live in the true home inside ourselves.

An Invitation 

Please share your stories of love and hope and joy. The stories where you have stood in the light within. I challenge you to see this light and claim it, to give yourself the gift of being seen. 

Please share the stories of others who have pushed you to see that you can choose the beauty and possibility and love.  

These stories can be simple. They might be one sentence. They might be a link to a blog post by another.

These stories can be anonymous.

These stories can be shared in whatever way calls you.

If you feel moved, please share your stories in the comments. I would love for this spot to be a place where your stories can rest...where your stories can become teachers to all of us. Perhaps you will decide to share your story on your blog, and if you do, I hope you will come back here to this post and leave a link in the comments.

A Shop Special

For these 12 days, I have listed the "hope," "joy," "love," and "home" simple soul mantra necklaces at a special price in the shop with free shipping for this item. But here is the catch: I would love to send this necklace to someone in your life who needs to be honored and reminded that they can choose hope and that they are loved and that they can live inside joy. Maybe they need to be given the gift of remembering the beauty of standing in the light of the true home that is inside them.

When you purchase this necklace, just indicate which word you would like on the necklace (choosing hope, love, home, or joy) and then include the recipient's address in the notes to seller. You can also let me know what you would like the accompanying note to say. (And, if you want to send it anonymously as a little surprise of hope in the mail, just let me know and I will include an anonymous note.)

And know this: If you are reading this and know that you are the one who most needs a message of love, hope, joy, or home as a talisman for your journey, well, the special is for you too. 

A Blog Series

Today, in another post, I am sharing pieces of what brought me to this moment and this belief that I can say "yes" to the beauty and the joy while standing tall in the real truth of my life (this originally appeared in this post but I have moved it to its own spot here). Then, beginning tomorrow, I will share a few of the lights along my path that have pushed me and taught me and held me in the midst of it all. 

Thank you (yes you) for being a light on my path...

Sending blessings to you across the miles,

Liz

in this moment...

in this moment,
i choose to look up
i notice instead of do 
i sit inside the inhale
i honor the worthiness in seeking the beauty
i let the truths drip down my back

in this moment, i know
(i trust) 

art for alabama

hope lives here soul mantra necklace

i wanted to let you know about the Art for Alabama auction happening over on facebook beginning this saturday. there are so many good things to bid on and buy to support the Alabama Red Cross after the devasting tornadoes this past April, including one of my "hope lives here" necklaces. i hope you will head over there to check it out.

sending blessings and light to your corner of the world,

liz

for you

 

indiana lilacs . may 2011

in this moment,

i send you sitting inside grief

and you feeling alone

and you believing it will shift

and you choosing joy

and you wishing for something else

and you grasping at the edge of hope

and you holding life

and you who thought it would be different

and you needing to exhale

and you praying for rain

and you seeking a life raft

and you hoping to forget

and you knowing it is time

and you wanting to dance in the beauty

in this moment,

i send you light and love

and a moment to remember that you

(yes you)

are enough

gather the kindling

retreat altar . midwest inner excavation retreat, may 2011

Close your eyes
Gather all the kindling
About your heart
To create one spark.
That is all you need
To nourish the flame
That will cleanse the dark
Of its weight of festered fear.

from "For Courage" by John O'Donohue (from To Bless the Space Between Us: A Book of Blessings)

trust this truth

musings on spring (3)

market tulips . may 4, 2011

my heart carries
yellow honey-scented blooms
green i want to live inside
the unbending truth that you will return