surrendering

Tonight, I am writing you from the land of antibiotics and vick's vaporub and literally trying to breathe and so many mugs of tea + honey as this mama is down for the count with a bug. 

In this moment, I am surrendering to not making cookies or getting it all done or cooking from the pile of waiting recipes or being cheery.

I am surrendering to asking for help and letting Jon do almost all of it.

I am surrendering to asking for more time and saying no.

I am surrendering to disappointment and exhaustion.

I am surrendering to answering "what do you need right now" with the truth (and the truth was biscuits + lingonberry jam).

I am surrendering to unexpected laughter and a little girl's need for cuddles.

I am surrendering to the breath surrounding patience.

I am surrendering to tears.

I am surrendering to just being right here.

I am surrendering to rest.

I am surrendering to the choice that awaits in each moment.