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in this moment {what is real}


in this moment, i am sitting inside hope, inviting my emotional self to rest, keeping my eyes open (barely), climbing a learning curve, focusing on a little bean, and remembering (trying to remember) to breathe.


about five years ago, i was in manzanita oregon (a place that has a piece of my heart) at a yoga retreat. during that retreat, i wrote the following: my work is to create peace around me and to write about true things, feelings, and moments so that others will know they are not alone....this is my practice. (you can read more about this here.)

a few weeks later, i started this blog, and that phrase has been a guide as i share things in this space. and, of course, i learned that by sharing the truth, i know that i am not alone.

today is a day where i need to be reminded of this.

for the last two days, we have been with miss ellie in the pediatric ICU. her heart has been "having a time of it." she is okay, and we expect that to continue. but we are scared and trying to stay really really present as we give so much love to this little one.

so if you feel moved, could you close your eyes and breathe deeply and send a little love and a few prayers to a little room in tacoma where a little heart (and a little family) is trying to find its way.

thank you...



Reader Comments (64)

i have been here with my boys ... breathing hope and love and many prayers. i love you.

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdarlene

Done. My prayers are with you.

Thanks for all your wonderful messages that touch my heart!

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commenteranna K.

every star in the sky tonight is a shiny wish of love and hope for you. you are a mama warrior (even when you don't feel like one, or want to be), hang in there. big hugs to you my friend.

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermindy

you know we are honey. love you.

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterjen

sending prayers and hugs and more hugs and more prayers....

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterkelly

so much love to you miss ellie and gigantic hugs to you liz and to jon too.

i'm so glad to hear that she's ok right now and am taking deep breaths of love and trust that you 3 (and her sweet little heart) will indeed find your way through this.

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commentervivienne

i am here on this yellow sheet, where early evening light is falling.
i raised my right hand before me, reaching out to miss ellie, you, your husband + all of your beloveds.
my left hand rests on my heart.
heart to heart + heart + heart...
i am with you.
you are all surrounded ~ by beings seen + unseen.
we are holding you + your little family.
we are breathing you into peace, breath by breath.
with love, so much love, dear sister,

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermeghan

I am lighting a candle for you.

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCait O'Connor

sending love and love and love

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterliz c.

I am holding these thoughts for Ellie:

The light of God surrounds her,
the love of God enfold her,
the power of God protects her,
the prescence of God watches over her.
All is well.

I know that at all times, she is being met with compassionate and highly skilled caregivers of all kinds who will help her to heal and thrive.

xox to you and Jon. Keep the faith.

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLelainia Lloyd

sending so much love and many prayers...to the little space where you are already surrounded with love and light.

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermarilyn

our little unearth alter is now burning brite. sending up many prayers for little ellie, mama and papa.
love love love you all.

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterkelly

You are extremely strong and brave. I am glad you are by my side at this time.

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJonny

Breathing in....her heartbeat steadies.
Breathing out....your heartbeat steadies.

Sending lots of healing energy.

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterpixie

holding you all so close in thought and prayer, beautiful mama.
love, love, love.

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKirsten Michelle

When we are feeling most alone, most helpless, that is when love steps in to say you are not alone, nor are you helpless.

Prayers for Miss Ellie from east coast Canada...

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDeborah Carr

Well hello there, Warrior Mama Woman. I've never seen tired eyes look so fierce and strong at the same time. I've been thinking of you three so much.

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJenna/The Word Cellar

i have been thinking of you and praying for your little baby doll. you are not alone. xoxo

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermisty

i will keep your daughter in my thoughts and prayers. love to your family from me. xo

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterbella

thinking of you and the little one. i am praying for you all. love you.

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermindy lacefield

Sending restful thoughts for you and healing thoughts for Miss Ellie.

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJolie

prayers, positive thoughts, love being sent your way.

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKelly

Ellie, Ellie, Ellie, Ellie, Ellie, Ellie, Ellie, Ellie....that's how many times a second God is hearing her name in prayer. Love to each of you.

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterjo

Sending you love, hope, and prayers. The Hilton Head folks gave me a candle to light for you and your family. Hang in there, friend.

July 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGinny

beautiful, brave mama
beautiful, brave jon
beautiful, brave ellie

i am praying for you, lighting a candle for you, and sending you blankets of love.


July 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterkolleen

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