musings on spring {2}

front-yard crocus . march 2011

today,

as i sit inside the missing

spring brings with her each year,

i pretend all of who you are

has arrived by chickadee wing

and your chosen path

is to slowly blow open

each petal of the crocus

an invitation to wishBIG ecamp (and a giveaway)

I am so delighted to share with you that I am teaching at wishBIG ecamp!

This online ecamp/virtual retreat takes place March 21 – March 27, 2011, and it is packed full of so many incredible classes.

As Mindy (your Camp Director) shares:

Let’s kick off spring together! come immerse yourself in an online experience that is all about rocking your creative girl power in a unique and fun online community and event!

Your week at camp includes:

• 10 (2 hour) online creative living workshops from a host of fabulously inspiring camp counselors, each of them bringing their own special talent and insight to help you wishBIG, createBIG and liveBIG! (schedule and descriptions below). all classes will be available online through the end of april and are self paced.

• camp T-shirts for all campers!

• daily ecamp inspiration postcards (via email) created especially for you by our talented teachers

• evening campfire gatherings and activities to encourage community and fun!

• ecamp cabinmates to help you connect with local campers

…and it wouldn’t be camp without s’mores!

*****

I am simply delighted to be teaching with the following incredible creative ladies: Kelly Barton, Violette Clarke, Shona Cole, Shannon Kinney-Duh, Goddess Leonie, Darrah Parker, Jamie Ridler, Andrea Schroeder, and Kate Swoboda. (Peek into all their juicy classes here.)

And I am quite sure I speak for all of them when I say that we hope you will come along and join us on this adventure where you will spend time playing, discovering, getting messy, writing, taking photographs, and uncovering pieces of who you are as you claim the creative dreams you want to live into reality.

Here is some information about my class: Creative Senses Adventure & Guided Meditation

I close my eyes and see an image of a nine-year-old little girl with brown pigtails who gathers up a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, her current Trixie Belden book, a thermos of apple juice, and her newest diary and favorite blue pen and tucks them inside a backpack. She tiptoes out the back, carefully closing the squeaky screen door and jumps down the two steps to the brick patio. She looks out toward the forest seemingly unaware that she has less than a quarter of an acre to explore as she finds the path toward her favorite log beside the chain-link fence. 

I often think about this little girl when I gather up my camera and journal and head out to the woods to breathe and notice and find myself again in the midst of all that must get done… In this workshop, we will use the senses to look at where we are in this moment and to remember the real and imagined adventures of the child’s spirit that lives inside us. We will closely examine how the senses can be an important tool in our personal and creative toolbox as we take our cameras on a photography excursion and put pen to paper to find a poem or two waiting within us. We will also explore ways to quiet our minds through guided meditation exercises and look at how focusing on the breath can connect us to our day-to-day experiences. This is your invitation to come along and explore the textures of your world, meet your inner poet, breathe deeply, and find your center.

*****

Today, I am so happy to be able to give away one spot at wishBig ecamp. To enter to win this spot, please leave a comment sharing one creative dream that is sitting inside your heart today.

The giveaway will be open until Thursday at noon PST.

musings on spring {1}

backyard cherry tree . march 2011

curled tightly inward
it is a specific sort of waiting
listening to the consistent smattering of rain
then robin's arrival 
(a lone trumpet on the stage)

turning helplessness into compassion.

 

ganesh ready for action . manzanita, oregon . late february 2011

On a day like today, when I turn on the news and am simply in horror at what I see...when I am oceans away from devastation and visuals that look like they are from a work of fiction from a Hollywood studio, i find myself standing inside helplessness. Unsure of what to do.

Sometimes, in my overwhelm at seeing all these visuals, I can make it about my helplessness instead of focusing on what I can actually do.

Maybe you are there too. Perhaps we turn off the news, ashamed because we "cannot handle" what we see. The guilt of being worried about what to make for dinner in a kitchen full of food or the realization that what to wear doesn't really matter at all becomes a reality as we see houses swept away. Swept away.

I am trusting that concrete ways to help in the small ways we can will present themselves as we continue to see it all unfold, but this morning, I am lighting a candle of hope, strength, and love and gathering Ellie Jane up in my arms and turning to what I know. Sending out compassion and hope and strength feels like something almost tangible I can do in this moment.

Maybe you will want to join me. 

(If you would like to join in and listen to a guided meditation about sending compassion out into the world, head over to this page in the Find Your Center section of my site.)

in hope and light,

liz

an evening...

what is real (march 8)

it was a day.

one of those.

one part beauty and one part oh my god how did i get here with a dash of just do it girl.

i changed out of pajamas by 10.

so that felt like perfection.

by 10:15 i had apples+sweet potatoes sweetly kissed (ahem) in various spots of my shirt + purple dress i had put over my yoga pants to feel like i was actually dressed like i might leave the house.

one piece of toast eaten was at some point.

thank god it had peanut butter on it as it ended up needing to last me until jon brought something home around 4:30.

in the midst of that there was an answer from the universe disguised as a (thank you for you) phone call with a friend.

and a nap was taken by someone other than me.

a short nap.

a seriously girl you have got to be kidding me short nap.

and a dog breathed her is that really your breath breath in my face while seeking attention.

i let her kiss me.

i think she was after the apples+sweet potatoes.

somewhere in there i began to dream about going to a bookstore and out to dinner.

but the i think i will be fussies arrived in full swing. 

the maybe i am just gonna go ahead and get two more teeth fussies.

or perhaps it is the i am just not feeling happy fussies.

hopefully it isn't the i feel a cold coming adventure.

so i found myself just holding on.

the to do list as always tapping at the corner of my mind while i sang about rainbows and changed the words to several songs while playing peekaboo.

a lunch/early dinner arrived via jon.

and i found myself saying maybe i could just run over to the bookstore.

after you eat.

just me.

okay was the reply.

a change of clothes.

a decision that three-day-old dirty hair actually starts looking good on the eve of day four.

add boots.

gotta have them boots.

plus the happy yellow purse.

and into the car i went.

alone.

a.l.o.n.e.

i sang loudly as i crossed the bridge with the sun almost setting and the olympic mountains peeking through the clouds.

loudly.

"and i'm gonna drive thru the hills with my hand out the window and sing till i run out of words."*

then wandered and gathered goodness at the bookstore.

so. much. goodness.

including two more notebooks because we all agree i need more of those.

then had the reminder that bad customer service in adorable children's stores always helps me save my money.

(guess she missed the boots.)

and then a call from home.

all was okay in the way it is when someone knows you need a deep breath but has a question.

do you need me to come home?

we are okay the response.

so maybe i will try that wine bar flitted through my mind.

one glass and time with some new to me sharon olds and an at the ready notebook.

and then i looked across the parking lot and said out loud or i could go to a movie.

(right now)

totally alone.

immersed in something other than all that must get done or those who need me for almost two hours.

alone.

i actually felt my heart quicken.

totally alone.

another call.

just text if you need me.

within minutes a moment to myself in the bathroom where i looked in the mirror and laughed because i felt like i was playing hooky for the first time ever.

in my whole life.

the good girl playing hooky.

with a side of popcorn+frozen coke+darkness+a row to myself+silly previews+johnny depp.

on the way home, i turned the dial up even more.

"and i'm gonna drive to the ocean, go skinny dipping, blow kisses to venus and mars."*

yes.

(soon.)

*from "wedding day" by rosie thomas

new in the shop (or how i continue to find my way)

new necklaces in the shop

still working on that mountain of things to do over here, but happy to report that i did get a few new items listed in the shop. a small "almost spring" collection and a few ready to ship/one of a kind necklaces.

after a long talk with a friend who let me ramble in circles as i wished for an assistant and the gift of rest, i have decided to close my shop for the weeks surrounding the next retreat (which is the Joy retreat...there are still five spots left!). UPDATE: (realized a few things about my schedule and am modifying the dates i originally put here) so i will be closing my etsy shop from March 28 to around April 18 to give myself some time to focus on the other aspects of my creative business, including workshops, retreats, and some other fun things i have waiting in the idea journal...and i will be working on a fun new spring collection for the shop during that time too.

i am actually organizing and hosting five retreats this year and the first four happen one right after the other (including one in the midwest...have you heard? kelly b and i are really doing it! yep. culver, indiana in may. more information right here). i am so excited about these retreats and the first one, Pen & Paper, unfolded so beautifully (more on that soon) and gently pushed me to continue to own that i do feel like this is my calliing...to gather women to play and create and sit in the quiet and share pieces of their stories. it is a gift to be present at these gatherings.

as i said to my friend, i am at this place where i have to admit that i feel behind in many things because i am a work at home mama to a little one who needs me more than anyone else does, but i also feel like i am at this important place on my creative path. there is an intense push and pull happening inside me at times. and even though i know this is part of it, part of this new mama experience, it still is what it is. and it is happening. and it is going to keep happening. i am learning that i simply must say "no" because life is unpredictable with a baby, especially one who has health "stuff" and daily medication and doctor's appointments and how the list goes on. letting people down can feel a bit like i am suffocating (do you know that feeling?) but i am standing in the truth that letting ellie down is not an option right now. 

so as i continue to find my way, i deeply appreciate you being out there reminding me i am not alone as i do this...one breath, one step, repeat repeat repeat. 

happy weekend to you in your corner of the world,

liz

nine months.

nine months today . celebrating with carrots and apples

::home::

my family . february 28, 2011

i went to the coast and forgot to tell you.

i went to the coast and was encircled by truth and love and hope and friendship and the real.ness that comes when you open your heart to all that awaits.

and suddenly i am home again.

this morning, my head still on the pillow, it felt like i was sitting on the first step of the mountain littered with items labeled "to do" and "please respond" and "would you, could you" and "so much goodness" and "would it be possible to" and "all that must be done" and "deadlines" and "orders" and "i can't wait to get started on" and "there is so much i want to tell you" and how the list goes on.

and then a giggle from another room and the mountain shifts to a home and a little girl and day that awaits and whispers of "i sleep in my crib now" and "look at how i hold my bottle" and "are you really here?" and "i roll over and love it" and "i might crawl if i don't walk first" and "sitting at the table is the best" and "will you sing that one again?" and then another smile so wide and my heart tries to capture it...my open oh my goodness can it really be this open heart tries to tuck all of this inside the pocket labeled "be right here" and i nod knowing the mountain can wait until tomorrow.