Ten minutes before this moment we were both yelling and I was setting the boundary of giving us space by walking the five feet to the kitchen and unloading the dishwasher. She cried and got really mad and then listened to her choices of staying at the table with kindness or playing alone while I kept cleaning. She chose to stay. So here we are laughing and cutting and staying in it.
It can be so hard to stay in it sometimes, but gosh when you do, you create so much more space for love.
And I guess I have a thing about sharing the "real" moments at the table right now. It feels important to gather evidence of what life looks like over here and remind myself of the little wins in the midst of all of it...of the ways I can hold beauty in one hand and the grit in the other and see them both and nod and say, "Yes, this."
(And I've been reading Parenting with Love and Logic and the idea of giving two choices that are positive come from that. It is really helping us and I highly recommend it...even if Ellie does sometimes say, "I don't want the choices again Mama.")