The popcorn is the first thing your nose finds. But I am in Seattle, so coffee is the next. There is the popcorn, candy, pop concessions guy and the coffee barista concessions guy. Later, after the popcorn has been devoured, I smell my wool sweater as I bring the corner of my sleeve to my eyes to wipe a tear.
Popcorn, of course. And cherry coke. The bubbles, the fizz, the syrup, the way it slides down my throat. My special treat when I go to the movies. Love it.
Stirring music that danced with the scenery, the feelings, the acting on the screen. A few moments invited audible laughter, but throughout the story, the people around me were quiet. Words filled with emotion, simple and complex feelings, love, pain, sadness, fear, hope, anger, happiness. A day later, I still feel haunted by these words and the feelings they invited with their resonance.
In between my husband and my friend, I am the keeper of the popcorn. I hold the bag in my hand and feel the course fluffs of popcorn in my hand as I bring the pieces to my mouth. I move the bag from one side to the other so they both can reach it. Halfway through the movie I grab my husband's hand, and I do not let go. The sadness invites the need for reassurance. With each breath it is as though the feelings I see on the screen are also felt by me. As though the words of the actors reach out from the screen like a hand, and the palm of that hand gently touches my chest. An understanding. The literal feeling of human emotion as an action inside. Tears, laughter, smiles, a creased forehead. As I get up from my seat and put my coat on it feels a bit like a cloak of protection.
An incredible old theatre that is now a movie house. The large red curtain opens as the previews begin. The movie we have come to see starts and within the first few minutes my eyes are reveling in the vivid, gorgeous scenery. Right there with them as they ride up those hills. The wonder of new love, joy of hope, fear of pain on the faces on the screen. A glimpse into 60's Wyoming, true love, lies, marriage, a cowboy's life, family. Another time. Would the fear be as wide and deep today? I don't know; my own fear is that it is. A beautiful, inspiring, sad movie that illustrates its truth without fear. We sat in our seats as the credits rolled. Partly because the three of us did not want to move; partly because my friend was crying. And as we saw the last two words on the screen, "The End," the big red curtains closed. It was such a simple moment. The End. The curtains close. The story ends. But we will not forget.
Beauty can be found in the spectrum of human emotions...beauty. Do not be afraid to feel.