the practice

seeking the beauty in the quiet moments

we continue to really be in summer over here; there is a permission given to relax and laugh and get outside and watch movies and rest and just be a little family together. i recently wrote this in an email, "time is flying by as i am finally sinking into living after so many months of survival mode. i didn't even realize i was still in it until i was out of it." it does feel like we are coming out of hiberation after months of worry and so so many doctor's appointments and how the list goes on. ellie continues to be doing great overall...growing...hopefully growing out of her other two heart issues. time will tell as always.

i have been thinking about this idea of how sometimes we don't even realize we are in survival mode until we are out of it. how the body and mind adjust to what must be done. how we protect ourselves in order to focus on what seems to be or is important. how my mind can distract me with its swirling, twirling ways. how this little grey with an apple on top box of wonder that holds worlds can distract me too. but then something will shift to quiet my mind. there will be a slowing down...a noticing...an invitation to be right here.

as i work on some current projects (including the i-am-so-excited-about-this content for emerge), i am observing how my practice of trying to be right here through photography and writing and creating in my studio and reading poetry and taking a breath or two or three has given me a map of sorts to get through the times of survival mode.

this idea of having a practice that you work with (as much as possible) daily means you practice on the good days where you have so much energy and your outlook is "hello world. bring it." it means you practice on the days when you stay in your pajamas and eat ice cream for breakfast. and again on the days when it rains and hails and when the sun shines so bright you have to leave the grumps behind. you practice on those usual sort of days so that when you suddenly encounter a day that finds you in a hospital or standing next to the phone after hearing something that has changed life forever or walking the path of grief and loss and sadness or even when you have just had a simple shift that confuses you or when something beautiful is going to take you on an adventure and you fear you will not find your way...

you practice so that when you encounter those "i have no idea where i am" sort of days, you will find a bit of light because you will see that hand in the darkness in the form of your practice. you will find light as you take a photo that captures the realness of a moment. you will find light as your write down every word that lives inside your fear. you will find light inside a poem written by someone else from another time who pushes you to know you are not alone. you will find light inside sitting in the quiet and letting the space around your heart grow with each breath.

you practice to begin to notice the beauty, the joy, the truth that is (always) there.

you practice to find the light. 

you practice.

you practice.

i stood tall

as the evening sun created a face-to-face meeting of one, i stood tall remembering that light can be found in the rootedness. 

the beauty in the breakdown

this evening, i chased the light until the sun sunk below the trees rooted in the distance as i danced in the beauty and the sadness of the last of the peonies. being a light hunter is pushing me to play and look closer and open up. yes.

(with a nod to frou frou and the song "let go" for the inspiration for the title of this post. as i took these photos, the song started playing in my mind, so i followed it here.)

this poppy

this poppy. oh my goodness this poppy. along the street in the fremont neighborhood, it stopped me in my tracks. it was watching me as i took photos on my sunday date for one. the first date for one in seattle i have had in more than a year. it stopped me, and we had a conversation as the sun was peeking through the clouds. i found myself asking if i could take its portrait because i never wanted to forget this moment where a poppy seemed to (or rather did) stare right through me. a moment where i practically leaned into traffic to snap this photo. later i wondered if she had been holding up a mirror. but now, yes, now i think she just wanted to be seen. i have been there...

(inspired by light hunters and all the gorgeous photos being taken by this month's group)

scenes from this day (july 2)

i want to remember her inquisitive nature and how she reaches for the camera whenever she sees me behind it

i want to remember choosing to be out in the world and exploring together even when it means taking turns holding her and dancing in doorways while the other eats alone at the table

i want to remember the brightness, the warmth, the moments that seemed to await our arrival

i want to remember how we settled into a rhythm of summer, of family, of being

i want to remember how we decided to push through all of it to choose love

i want to remember how she laughs all the time and finds joy is the simplest moments of together

i want to remember pushing through imperfections and deciding to just be right here capturing what it is to deeply live

*****

"Scenes from This Day" is a prompt in my book Inner Excavation. It's about taking your camera with you on your day-to-day moments and capturing what it is to be in your corner of the world. It's about letting go of the need for the perfect photo from the perfect day and instead using the camera to document the small moments that make up your life. It's about telling the story, your story, in the way that will help you to remember the textures and rhythms and sacredness.

be right here

(light hunters day 1)

as you sit over there, in your corner of the world, i hope you will remember to breathe deeply and trust yourself as you get ready to take the next step.

but before you begin,
just be right here
and breathe in all that you know.

the view from here

(taken with incredibooth ipad app)

emerge: an online course

joy and friendship on the oregon coast . february 2011

So excited to share this with you today!

This August brings Emerge, the premier online course from Live it to the Full, that I will be teaching alongside Vivienne McMaster and Jenna McGuiggan. Do you know Live it to the Full? Here's the scoop on this great new project:

Live it to the Full is a place of refuge for people seeking a new way of processing through a transitional period in their life. Our mission is to foster new ways of looking at age old dilemmas through art, photography and storytelling. We seek to provide quality material and qualified instructors at an affordable price and an accessible portal.

I am simply delighted to be teaching with Viv and Jenna. They are two women I am so blessed to call my friends, and they are two women who are sharing their stories with others in ways that are changing the world. (I know this to be true.) So working with them on a course all about emerging from the transitions in our lives? Yep. Sign me up. 

For four weeks this August, we'll play with words, photography, mindfulness practices, and other creative goodies to explore how we weather and emerge from transitions.

Here's the full course description:

How do we emerge from life's transitions and become more fully ourselves? Is it possible to be cracked open and made whole at the same time? Some transitions are big and bold life events, while others happen in the quiet moments of daily life. But each has the power to shape us and how we live in the world.

Come along as we share our personal stories of transition and provide you with creative tools to use as you face your own seasons of change. Through writing, photography, and mindfulness practices, we’ll explore the ebb and flow of happiness, the unique power of telling your story, and the beautiful yet precarious process of learning to trust yourself. See what happens when you allow your true self to emerge through creativity.

Registration for Emerge is now open, and the cost is totally at what I call a "happy price" of $49!

This experience will be full of juicy, bite-sized pieces to help you through whatever kind of transition (huge or tiny) that you're facing.

Viv, Jenna, and I would love to see you there.